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by ericblair2084
on Fri May 05, 2006 11:35 pm |
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Do non-smokers get it yet?
You are next. |
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ericblair2084
Enthusiastic Smoker
Joined: Mar 19, 2006
Posts: 714
Location: Exit 13/Sulfur Dioxide, Toxic Waste, Superfund, Landfill, $5 Billion in debt, Socialist, NJ
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by ericblair2084
on Fri May 05, 2006 11:54 pm |
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JRS, while I appreciate your zeal for wanting to punish real criminals, I think you are missing the punch line. The key words were death row inmates. i.e. These people are going to die anyway.
Back in the day, when prisoners were facing a firing squad, at least they had the courtesy of asking the condemned if they wanted a cigarette. |
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ericblair2084
Enthusiastic Smoker
Joined: Mar 19, 2006
Posts: 714
Location: Exit 13/Sulfur Dioxide, Toxic Waste, Superfund, Landfill, $5 Billion in debt, Socialist, NJ
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by Torquemeda
on Sat May 06, 2006 4:49 am |
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Nowadays it'd be: "Do you want a smoke-free environment?"
If someone said, "Yes!" they'd just shoot 'em. |
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Torquemeda
Smoking Lobby Sponsor
Joined: May 23, 2005
Posts: 1087
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by ericblair2084
on Sun May 07, 2006 2:24 pm |
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6. Spongebob Squarepants indicted for Thoughtcrimes!
Off to room 1 with Spongebob, who will face days of torture at the hands of the health nazis for poisoning the Hitler Youth with unhealthy foods.
http://www.businessweek.com/bwdaily/dnflash/feb2005/nf20050217_6978_db042.htm
The Center for Science in the Public Interest says SpongeBob contributes to childhood obesity by hawking Kellogg's (K ) Pop Tarts, Kraft (KFT ) Macaroni & Cheese, Oscar Meyer Lunchables, in addition to cookies and fast food.
Lets take an inventory of the problems that face our young people today:
Anorexia, Bulemia, teen suicide, Crystal Meth, X, gang violence, guns and knives in schools, teen pregnancy, VD, unprotected sex, Columbine, drunk driving, binge drinking, and _______ (feel free to fill in the blank).
And what are the health nannies worried about? Ice Cream and Candy?
The meteor is getting close! I hear REM in the background singing "It's the End of the World (as We Know It). |
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ericblair2084
Enthusiastic Smoker
Joined: Mar 19, 2006
Posts: 714
Location: Exit 13/Sulfur Dioxide, Toxic Waste, Superfund, Landfill, $5 Billion in debt, Socialist, NJ
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by ericblair2084
on Sun May 07, 2006 2:32 pm |
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ericblair2084
Enthusiastic Smoker
Joined: Mar 19, 2006
Posts: 714
Location: Exit 13/Sulfur Dioxide, Toxic Waste, Superfund, Landfill, $5 Billion in debt, Socialist, NJ
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by ericblair2084
on Sun May 07, 2006 2:41 pm |
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| PS: For anti's who don't recognize the name John Banzhaf, you are the equivalent of Christians who don't know who Jesus of Nazareth was. |
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ericblair2084
Enthusiastic Smoker
Joined: Mar 19, 2006
Posts: 714
Location: Exit 13/Sulfur Dioxide, Toxic Waste, Superfund, Landfill, $5 Billion in debt, Socialist, NJ
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by Torquemeda
on Mon May 08, 2006 11:30 pm |
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How 'bout this one from Wikipedia about the Cookie Monster?:
"On April 12, 2005, Sesame Street producers announced that Cookie Monster will be eating healthy foods and advocating "cookies are a sometimes food". Shortly afterwards, The Washington Post ran a piece on April 23, 2005 lamenting that political correctness was stripping Cookie Monster of his beloved cookies.[1]"
Oh, Eric, nice job on your username...I just figured out the signifigance of it. |
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Torquemeda
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by JoshNJ
on Tue May 09, 2006 11:04 pm |
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Torquemeda wrote: How 'bout this one from Wikipedia about the Cookie Monster?:
"On April 12, 2005, Sesame Street producers announced that Cookie Monster will be eating healthy foods and advocating "cookies are a sometimes food". Shortly afterwards, The Washington Post ran a piece on April 23, 2005 lamenting that political correctness was stripping Cookie Monster of his beloved cookies.[1]"
Oh, Eric, nice job on your username...I just figured out the signifigance of it.
How insane is that? The friggin cookie monster not eating cookies?? That was a very sad decision indeed. |
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JoshNJ
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by ericblair2084
on Wed May 10, 2006 7:19 pm |
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Well, there you have it courtesy of Torquemada:
5. Health Reich send "Cookie Monster" to Auschwitz, replace him with the "Salad, Tofu, Soybean, Asparagus, Brussel Sprout, South Beach Diet Monster."
Or as Mr. Rogers would say:
Can you kids say "Salad, Tofu, Soybean, Asparagus, Brussel Sprout, South Beach Diet Monster." That's a big word.
I knew you could.
Well, I watched the latest Sesame Street episode and it was really a shock. Special guest stars were John Banzhaf, Hitler and Goebels.
Cut to "Cookie Monster" on screen, speaking in his deep gravelly voice that sounds like Dikembe Motumbo.
Cookie Monster: Now, me eat...cookie! Yum, yum, yu...ow, hey!
John Banzhaf enters picture, grabs cookies and devours them in one bite.
Banzhaf: There are going to be some changes around here, I'm in charge now.
Cookie Monster: No, wait, give me cookieeee!
Goebels goosesteps on screen in full Nazi uniform and pistol whips Cookie Monster across the face with a German Luger pistol. He is followed into the room by Hitler and 3 SS soldiers.
Goebels: Joo have interfered Mr. Monster wit our plan for a master race of physically fit, fat free children.
Little Child 1: Hey leave him alone.
Hitler: Do joo know vut the punishment is for dis crime?
Cookie Monster: Me not care, me just want cookie.
Banzhaf: Here, eat these brussel sprouts.
Cookie Monster: No, me just want cookie!
Hitler now grabs the Luger from Goebels and whacks Cookie Monster on both sides of his head.
Cookie Monster: Ow, why you do that?
Banzhaf: Just eat the brussell sprouts.
Cookie Monster: (clearing his throat), Okay, okay. Now me eat...Brussel sprouts...(shoving in mouth)...yum, yum, oh what the [freak]! This taste like [doodee], what is this?
(2 SS soldier club him over the head and ribs with their machine guns)
Hitler: Joo vill shut up and listen to us.
Cookie Monster: Motherfuckers! Cocksucking bastards! Why you do this?
Hitler points back to sign that reads;
Your body belongs to the Fuhrer! You have a duty to be healthy. Food is not a private matter. Nazi Socialist Party slogan.
Goebels: Send this fat blue slob on the next train to Auschwitz.
(motions to SS soldiers who begin to drag him away)
Cookie Monster: Help, somebody help! Bert, Ernie, Grover, Elmo! Help!
(Grover comes in with cape)
Grover: Heeelllooooo Everybodeeeeee! It is I, you're furry pal Supergrover, coming to save the day.
Goebels: Look at joo, all skinny. You look like de prisoner who just escaped from Bergen-Belsen concentration camp. Grab him and send him back.
Grover: I may be skinny but I am wiry. Hiyaaa! (Lunges for SS soldiers in Karate chop motion but is beaten down like the 100 pound inmate at Rikers Island)
Hitler: Take dem both away.
Grover and Cookie Monster: Help! Save us, anybody, JRS, help.
To be continued...
I for one will never be the same after watching that. |
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ericblair2084
Enthusiastic Smoker
Joined: Mar 19, 2006
Posts: 714
Location: Exit 13/Sulfur Dioxide, Toxic Waste, Superfund, Landfill, $5 Billion in debt, Socialist, NJ
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by JRS9000
on Sat May 13, 2006 4:53 pm |
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Some are resigned to this new regulation, arguing: if government is assigned the role of paying for health care, it is entitled to intervene to reduce the risks of disease and thus reduce the costs.
Read the above JRS. Tell me again why socialized national health care is a brilliant idea.
Eric:
Read the above and tell me why privatized healthcare is a brilliant idea. Aren't private companies in the business of making money, which would entail intervention to reduce the risks and thus reduce the costs?
One country, one payer, one set of rules that applies to everyone, regardless of economic background, and a private employer's complete loss of his ability to tell you that you can't smoke because it's costing him too much money. The idea that private employers, who already have enough on their plate as it is, should subsidize his employees' healthcare is absurd.
Imagine fracturing your ankle while base jumping (certainly a risky behavior, just like smoking), being taken to an emergency room, having your ankle set, then spending a few days in the hospital, and never receiving a bill. Or, imagine the same scenario where the government pays 85% of your medical bills, leaving you with the remaining 15%, which is easily covered by an inexpensive rider policy that most, if not all, citizens can afford. Imagine fracturing your ankle base jumping in, say, Spain, and the US government flying you back to the US where it can take care of you in a more cost-effective, yet just as medically advanced, way. Imagine not having to shop around to see which pharmacy has the best price on Percodan to help you with your post-fracture pain.
These scenarios already exist, just not in the US. |
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JRS9000
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